July 6th 2005....

Three things come to mind about today's date.
1. Tristan (Our Nephew) - It's his 12th birthday today
2. George W Bush - Tristan shares his birthday with our president.. Lucky him (/sarcasm)
3. Cruise day! Not Tommy... No, rfamily cruise starts soon!! :) Next year they are going up the west coast from Seattle (I think) and going through Alaska.. I hope that Rosie and her family and all of those cruisers have a WONDERFUL time... but something tells me that they will :)

Jim is gone all day today - 11am to 7pm. At the McJob - I McMiss him :)

I need to make some phone calls, my sister, and Tristan. I want to call my sister, and hope she is doing well, and everything is going along ok with the pregnancy. It won't be long til I have a new little nephew or niece. Which reminds me, we had better pick out a unique and cool baby gift. Anyone with ideas on baby gifts, you'll have to enlighten me ;) -- but here is my deal. I don't know WHY I have to be like this.. but I am ... now.. we don't have long distance on our phone. So we have to have a phone card to call anyone out of town. Not a big deal. But Sarah has really only called me once since I moved here more than a month ago. I know that she is probably way more busy than I am, so I get that. But, she does have free minutes on her cell phone every night, and every weekend, and I know that when she works, she used to call me cuz she would get bored. I wonder if she isn't a little mad at me since we moved here right before she is going to have the baby. But, we did have good reason to move here, for Jim's school. I guess I put off telling her cuz I knew that she would be upset and I was trying to avoid her getting upset with me... but anyway.. I wonder how much she would actually bring over the baby for me to babysit anyway.. I know in her mind, my things, and my life does not quite measure up to her standards. I need to stop letting stupid stuff like this get to me, but I sure can't.. urgh.. anyway, I love Sarah, and I will love my new nephew or niece more than you can probably imagine, and I will be there for her any time and any way that I can. I fool myself sometimes into thinking that I would be useful to other people. I don't know why I do that, because when it comes down to it, no one needs me or depends on me for anything... ok.. sounds dramatic. I know that Jim loves me, and he wants me in his life, and my family loves me too. But when it comes down to it, I don't do anything for them. You know, how in most families, you have one person that is always there for cooking, or the one who does baking, or the one who organizes all the family get togethers, or the one who keeps everyone informed, or the one who is the emotional support, or the one who is... well, I don't know how to say it.. but I am not any of those helper people to my family. I just show up, visit, eat, clean up, leave... I don't know. I suppose I am just complaining.
Maybe it is this dumb summer chest cold. It feels like I have tiny little baby lungs, cuz when I take a big breath, it hurts like heck... It will go away soon :) And, Jim has the next 2 days off after today :) that is coooooool :) I guess I am done complaining for today. If you took the time to read this, here is some chocolate as payment :):):)

Angel Chasse (again)