Words found a lot on my blog :) Thanks Dr Deb :)

Completely about me.....

So, I posted before about how in August I turn 30.... well..
My parents own one of those time-shares that has timeshares everywhere it seems.
They invited Jim and I to spend a week at the end of August with them in Orlando Florida, and we happily have accepted (thank you to econonomic stimulus package) :)

We are going to explore the areas around Orlando, and also it will be my first time visiting/swimming in the ocean! Cocoa Beach FL here I come :)

We got fairly reasonable plane tickets thanks to my dad's relentless searching, and with the time share having a full kitchen, it really won't be too bad on the old pocketbook. I am very excited. Now, let's just all cross our fingers for no HURRICANES while we are there (last week in august) :)

I am pretty excited, both my mom and my husband grew up around the ocean (both in california) but I have never been. So I am excited about that, and to see all that the Orlando area has to offer!! Yay to turning thirty......not... hehe

Angel

Obama, and stuff about me :)

So, Obama is the "presumptive nominee" for the Democratic party in 2008. Wow, what a long long long journey it has been to this point. I guess I have to say that I am proud and awestruck that after the injustices of the civil war and beyond in this country, we have a black man running for president!!

I am turning 30 this year... what to do what to do... I hope to celebrate it and have some fun. It seems to me that 30 is "old" that 30 is.. not young anymore.. I guess I dont feel a lot different but I do notice that things and people seem to irritate me more easily. I am not sure if this is age, or climate, or just me, or what the deal is.. but I do know it has been happening... If anyone reads this, I would love to hear about what you did to celebrate your 30th birthday! I am not sure that a big trip is in the works, with prices of things the way they are, but I really want to do something meaningful, because for whatever reason, 30 seems important to me... not a twenty-something anymore not a teen..

Also with my 30th birthday, it feels that I need to finally accept and be ok with the fact that Jim and I will not have children. At this point, Jim in school, and me being 30 and him being almost 35, I really dont know that it would be right to bring a kid into the world, and be "old" while raising them... so with this 30 milestone, I need to and will give up on the fantasy of Jim and I having our own children. It will be hard, but I think that it needs to be addressed and dealt with and reckoned with once and for all.. It feels kind of like a death in the family, though there has been none. Sometimes, for a brief moment, I even revel in the idea that Jim and I are not sleep deprived, or trying to choose the best way to discipline a little one, or worrying about what kind of earth and world we will leave to them when we are gone.. but those are only passing moments. The other moments when I see a friend's child or I see the smile of a newborn in a store, seem to kill a little of me inside. But, I know that I can deal with this, and that I will deal with it, and the time to do so is now... so wish me luck :)

Camping and mars :-)

So this holiday weekend, we decided to go camping. You can see our camp setup at the left there. There is a small county park only about 5 miles from where we live, which is great with gas prices the way they are..and the park has a great trail for walking/riding bikes, and has a bathroom with a shower (with hot water no less) -- so for 6 dollars a night, it is a GREAT entertainment value!!

We had a great time camping, but we left after one night because we bought "sleeping mats" that are supposed to make it, well, less like you are sleeping on the ground, and more like you might want to ever sleep like that again :) haha.. we did not find them comfortable at all, so.. we had a great time, had a big campfire, and a great night of being out in nature and now we are back home.

One good thing about coming home on Sunday instead of Monday was that Jim got to track the Mars Lander on nasa.gov and got to see right away that it made a successful landing and is now sending back pictures!!! Pretty exciting.

Oh, and going back to the night before the camping and two nights before the Mars Lander, our friend Becky came over, and while on our way to eat, we were rear-ended. She has some pain in her back, which hopefully will clear up soon, but her car isn't going to heal very easily.. so, hopefully that is the last accident any of us will be in for a very long time!!!!

Eventful weekend, but more good than bad, Becky was able to come down and bbq with us, so we all had fun doing that too :)

What have I been doing?

Not a lot. Really, not a lot :)

I am super excited that Jimbo was granted summer work/study, so he doesn't have to find a McJob in the McHeat of summer :) He will be in the air conditioning thank goodness.

We have been riding our bikes almost every day, and most days 4 miles or more, up to about 11 miles for me, and about 20 miles for Jimbo. I hope that all of this exercising and trying to eat better pays off for me soon, but I am glad to report that it is working gangbusters for Jimbo! Down nearly 30 pounds! WOO HOO!!

I notice that we notice the weather more now that we use our bicycles... wind plays a role big time in me wanting to ride vs not wanting to ride! Jim will ride no matter what, but I am more picky :)

We planted 4 bel pepper plants out front of our apartment in a big pot, so I hope that I have a thumb at least green enough to have them make fruit :) :) With bell peppers here costing 88 cents each, it would be great to buy a plant for 1.50 that will bear 10 fruits over the summer season :) :) If this goes well, we will get a community garden plot next summer!! We live with in a half mile of the plots, so we could ride our bikes everyday to check the progress of our plants. :)

In other news, it is Mother's Day tomorrow. I sometimes have a hard time with this holiday as I am not a Mother, and I wish more than anything that I was. I tried to focus my energies this year on smothering my own Mom with cards etc, and friends that I know that are great Moms as well... but it is still a day of a bit of sadness for me. And a day of sadness for a great friend of mine that just very recently lost her own Mother. So I always try to keep in mind to say a special prayer for those that are a little bit unhappy on this particular holiday. But.....A salute to all of you that I know that are Mothers! It truly is the toughest job in the world, and it is the one that probably comes with the least amount of credit :) Thanks! I know that I have a WONDERFUL Mom, and I wish that all others could have one so great!

So, to sum up... haha.. not that I ramble... Jim got work study so he will be busy working at the school in the gym this summer... we hope to get a paddle boat to take on a nearby lake.. I will be turning 30 this August... let me see.. have I forgotten anything? Oh, we hope to hit up lots of garage sales for great deals on things we didn't even know we needed :) :)

If you read this post, then a red tulip is yours :)

Love,
Angel

Randy Pausch "The Last Lecture...

"Really Achieving Your Childhood Dreams," at CMU on September 18, 2007
Here is an experience of mine, seeing something on television that was "worth watching" I have the entire lecture posted here, on TV it was only snippets with Mr Pausch interviewed in between. There is also a book out, so I may get that as well. I hope that anyone seeing this page makes the hour and 15 minute commitment to see this video. I do not believe you will be disappointed. It is my opinion that you will be better for having seen it.

Cilantro....spring!

This is a picture of one of my cilantro plants sprouting :):):):

Hey, I planted some corriander (cilantro) seeds, about 20 of them or so, and 5 are starting to sprout... they have only been planted a bit over two weeks.. I am so excited. It is more like I am a happy new mama than just a happy gardener. I don't grow things. I do not have a green thumb...at all... but here we go. Just some one dollar starter soil stuff from Walmart, and a packet of seeds.. a little watering and some sun... wooo hoo.. look what nature made with my help!!!

I do understand that my reaction to this is so.. third grade.. but.. I can't help myself :) :)

There is a community garden here in vermillion, and I intend to get info on what goes on there, so that we can grow some hot peppers and some bell peppers. I figure a packet of seeds could make a big bell pepper plant, and they are pretty expensive in the stores, so why not try our hand at growing them ourselves? I hope it works out.. we have no place to put pots out here, but hopefully on our bikes we can go by and check on things that we plant in the community garden :) I am excited... and though they are talking of snow this thursday and friday, I am not hurt by that, since all I have planted so far is my cilantro, and it is indoors by a window with sun :)

Ok, I guess that is all for now, just wanted to share my little slice of spring with you guys. I figured that after all the gloomy dark blogs, I could and should certainly share my good news :)

Happy Springtime all!!!

Angel

Hello? Spring? It's me calling....

Ok.. wow.. so yeah...

Jim and I got our bikes out, and began faithfully riding. Jim mostly does it because he likes it, and it makes good exercise, and I mainly do it to add an exercise component to my "we are eating healthfully, now some exercise...what do I hate least in exercise? Oh bike riding with Jim" haha

So, we were riding every day, and I got up to about 4 miles or so comfortably, with only minimal complaining.. (OK I complain endlessly..sorry Jim) And, here is the big one, I was actually starting to like it a little.. getting to add that to eating right, so that hopefully I can lose some weight, but I guess more importantly, to not get winded as easily and to be able to just be in better shape overal, inside and out..

So I said all that to say this.. wow. Since we got our bikes out and started riding and every day since then has been crappy.. haha.. I guess that there have been maybe 2 days in there we could have ridden the bikes, but wow, it would have been too cold :)

So hello spring, this is Angel calling, and I would like it if you would please come to South Dakota and stay a while... I don't like your following friend SUMMER very much, but don't tell him I said that. ;-)

I hope that you guys all get a taste of spring that is a lasting one soon. And if you can, go for a bike ride... its faster than walking, and can be pretty fun ;-) and ride your bike to go get something to eat.. cuz if you do the math, you can have more wiggle room in your food choices if you rode your bike there, and are riding it home :):):)

What else is new with me? I guess not much! A friend of mine (Hi Shan!) is moving back into my neck of the woods from far far away soon :) very soon, and I promise her, and myself that I am going to VISIT her... no more anti-social me.. nope... and next on the list is going to visit another friend... she lives a bit farther away .. hello airplane trip :):) (Hi Marty!)

We are also thinking of saving up to get a paddle boat for the lake this summer.. I can't wait :)

Ok I think I will end this blog on that note, until something else strikes me :)

Angel

To Jim

Every once in a while, you hear a song, and it seems as if it was written about you and for you and even like you wrote it yourself... For me the most recent one is by

Rascal Flatts called.. Every Day

And I would dedicate every last word of this song to my husband, Jim
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



You could've bowed out gracefully
But you didn't
You knew enough to know
To leave well enough alone
But you wouldn't

I drive myself crazy
Tryin' to stay out of my own way
The messes that I make

But my secrets are so safe
The only one who gets me
Yeah, you get me

It's amazing to me
How every day
Every day, every day
You save my life

I come around all broken down and
crowded out and you're comfort

Sometimes the place I go
Is so deep and dark and desperate
I don't know, I don't know


Sometimes I swear, I don't know if
I'm comin' or goin'
But you always say something
Without even knowin'

That I'm hangin' on to your words
With all of my might and it's alright
Yeah, I'm alright for one more night-

Every day, every day, every day
Every day, every day
You save me, you save me, oh, oh, oh
Every day
Every, every, every day-

Every day you save my life

What do you do?

What do you do?

Motherhood. Mom. Grandma

What if those things are never going to happen for you?

What if you want more than most anything to be a mother, but your body is just not going to let that happen for you? How do you deal with that?

I struggle. I see kids. I see babies. I see people with babies.. I see people who don't even want babies but have them. I know people who have had abortions... I just dont know what to do with these feelings. I am sure that somewhere, probably even near me... is a support group of some sort, or there are online communities.. I guess my point is how does one just accept this, how does one become ok with the fact that they will never have a child of their own, and that adoption, may never be available for them either.

Is there just an epiphany one day where you can all of the sudden see how great it is to not have to worry about a child, or care for one, or afford one? Cuz if that is the case, I have not yet had that epiphany. Or do you just stop wanting what you can't have one day? Do you see all the positives in your own life as it is now and just stop wanting to add a child to that life? I would really really like to know, because sometimes now it feels like I have been robbed...

It seems to me that being a woman might not entitle you to much in the world, but it seems that everywhere I look, women are having babies. Some planned, some not planned, some loved and cherished.. others not so much. It seems that this is an easy thing. Fall in love CHECK Get married CHECK have a baby (BIG NO CHECK HERE)

I know that to some it seems that I obsess over this one thing. To me it is a big thing. I am not getting any younger. I am not saying that I would even be close to a perfect mother.. no way jose.. but I would LOVE and CHERISH and CARE FOR a baby, and to me, it seems like enough. If you are willing to put that baby above all else and care for it and love it and support and nurture it.. I dont see that as a bad thing. I know that adoption agencies have to be choosy about who they place these precious babies... but does being mentally ill and not having a job right now really mean that I would be any less of a good mother to a child? I dont think so.. but there are some.. many I would guess that do feel that way...

I know this post is angry, and hurtful in the way that it is written, but sometimes I really just dont know what to do with some feelings, and I had to vent somewhere.. where better than the good old world wide web. URGHHHHHHH

Sick

So I have nothing but time, sore time on my hands. So I shall blog...

Picture it, Friday before this... so the 15th.. Jim starts feeling icky.. sore all over... fever starts sunday.. take him to student health monday. They say its viral, take tylenol, claritin d and fluids etc. Ok, we go home, he starts that... Tuesday.. still fever, still sweats, still everything with the addition of sore throat and throwing up from coughing... yay.

Wed, thurs more of the same for Jimbo, worse feeling and worse.. so friday he tries to get an appt. Since everyone in vermillion and the tri state area is now sick, no appt. Nurse calls him in an antibiotic since he is coughing up so much ickiness.

Friday, I start to cough and etc... appt on saturday acute care... fun stuff

Need to mention that I have been to waLmart every day since monday, getting things for cough and cold and tp for blowing the noses etc...

Saturday.. we both sit in pain, and the only thing that seems to help is surfing the web to pass the time and get our minds off of it...

Sunday... I feel like crud, and jim still isnt much better. Add mucinex DM to the mix, and there is a funny scene with jim and I "doing drugs" in the kitchen... (using an inhaler that was part of the prescriptions we picked up) -- man bronchitis and whatever else this is that has a hold of us is powerful, and expensive! :)

Ok, so that is the update on the sick Chasse household. Ill update when I am feeling better... oh did I mention that the steroids and inhaler give me the jitters, thus the writing the blog so I am not just tapping my fingers? Ok.. later...

Angel.

Hello out there!

Here is my new email signature....

--From the desk of Angel Chasse

"Be kinder than necessary because everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle."


What do you guys think?


What have we been up to? Not a lot going on. Read a book about the last days and Anna Nicole Smith. Interesting read for sure. I never know where all the facts come from in these types of books, so I dont know what to think.. but interesting for sure.

My brother's baby was born!!! She is so beautiful! I got to take lots of pictures of her last weekend so that was great :)

Jim is just now getting over being sick. They think it was Influenza, but the testing and medicines for that are only effective the first day or two of symptoms, so he had to just suffer and suffer and suffer.... urgh...

Going to start reading Alan Alda's book I think next. Thank goodness for the library, I could never afford all of these current books!

Valentine's Day with my sweetie was sweet, and we are both watching what we eat and tracking it on a neat site called www.sparkpeople.com and we even did pretty well health wise that day... (including 6 heart shaped sugar cookies we couldn't resist baking) :)

Next up for us is probably just resting and getting rid of these pesky germs that we have been picking up, and hoping for WAARRRRMMMMER weather!!! ((GLOBAL WARMING)) HA

I shouldn't leave so much time between blogging, so that I don't forget all of what I was going to say.... take care everyone reading :) (Shan,Trill, Dr Deb, Lu...special shout out to you guys) :)

Moving....is..not fun

So... we were in a pretty small one bedroom apartment. We love the area and the apartments.. so when we outgrew that apartment we decided to upgrade to the 2bdrm apartment in the same complex.

Here is the thing. I love love love this new bigger more spacious and roomy apartment. It is actually big enough that it looks like we don't own enough stuff to fill it. HA HA.. So, just to recap.. love the new apartment...

Now.. here is the thing. I am guessing here that most people do not enjoy the task of moving. I am ome of those people. I am, in fact, one of the people that HATES moving. That's right, I brought out the big guns, the "H word" I really do not at all enjoy the packing and touching every single thing you own... literally. I also do not like boxing it, carrying it to the van, and then unloading it into the new apartment... then you get to unpack it all... ick ick

But I am over that now. We are moved, and unpacked. In what feels like record time. So now to just find the things we need to "fill the place up" :)

Oh, and I might have forgotten to mention that is was the coldest weekend of the year while we were moving :) Of course. Of course.

Maybe we will just have to live in this apartment for the next 60 years.. lol. No more moving that way!

Ok, the moving rant is over now :)
Stay warm all!

Angel

Happy New Year!

Happy New Year!

Welcome to 2008!

Let's all hope that 2008 is the best year yet for all of us!

More importantly, I hope that we are all healthy in 2008!

Take care!

Angel

Happy Holidays!

Why do I say Happy Holidays?

I say it because I want everyone I know and love that I am thinking of them, and that I want them to know that this is a special time of year for me. Winter starts, snow falls, a new year starts, and January 6th is the day that I celebrate the anniversary of Jim an I getting married. This year is our 10th :)

I also say it because I don't always know what holidays each of my friends celebrates. I wish you a Merry Christmas if you believe in the birth of Christ at this time of year, and Happy Hanukkah to those of Jewish faith... and to any others, just "I am thinking of you, and enjoy the end of this year and the start of the new"

I am so incredibly lucky to have Jim in my life, and overall for all of our circumstances. Thank you for taking the time to read this, and if you ARE reading this blog, you probably know me, and I know you... Take care, and be safe over the holidays and in the start of the new year!!!

With love,
Angel Chasse

Hello!

Wow,
I have been very lucky lately!

I sign up for lots of samples, and lately I have hit some mother loads :)

I got a new electric toothbrush, some whitening strips, some free photo prints, a free blood glucose monitor, lets see, free chocolate ;)

We went to "black friday" sales, but ended up at walmart for a baby chopper, baby crock pot, and baby george foreman grill thing. All cheap :) under 5 bucks :)

Now, looks like winter will finally be showing his face.. winter storm watch for the weekend. I guess making a date in another town with the hubby was just too much :) :)

Jim and I will have been married for 10 years on January 6th. Wow. It has flown by, but I know there were times where we both felt every second tick by on the clock :)

Marriage is... I don't know.. so many things, its trying, its rewarding, its comforting, at times infuriurating (sp), elegant, cozy,fulfilling,awe-inspiring,fun, exciting,new, jaw-dropping..... sure there are times when things are a bit mundane, or even rough, but the longer we are married, the more I just try to let those things fly by so that we can get back to the cuddle on the couch and enjoy a tv show or movie part :)

Sure, I dont do well at it sometimes, but I try :) It does help that I have an even-tempered, thoughtful, loving, compassionate, logical husband :)

It's a bit early, but Happy 10th Anniversary, My Love...


I guess I will end this one with that :)
Angel

Almost Thanksgiving?!?

Wow,

Somehow, time has really flown by!
Does everyone else feel like it is this close to Thanksgiving??

I should have more to report I suppose, after being off my blog for this long.. lol

www.angelchasse.com is up and running, and my cousin's baby is turning 1!!!

www.jimchasse.com is up and running too!

It is starting to get chilly here, but really not that cold, and many days it is still 60 :-) .. Global warming? ? ?

Jim and I visited his family, and we were soooo very excited to see that his sister and his mom have BOTH switched to CFL's (compact flourescent lightbulbs) -- GREEN GREEN GREEN :) and they have already seen the change in their electricity bill!

I get breaking news and health and entertainment updates via text message on my cell phone daily.. Today I got two.. one was "bird flu confirmed in England" and another was "biologist in grand canyon died of plague, transmitted by mountain lion" -- Wow, some days, just don't flip your phone open.

Oh, this just in Jim says that Folgers Custom Roast makes for good coffee :-) it was also cheaper than other coffees at the time :):) Double Yum!

www.blackfriday.info has some of the day after Thanksgiving sales flyers already up :) So far I think we are going to Best Buy only.. They have an MP3 Player for about half price that will do voice recording for Jim's classes... and they have 100 packs of blank dvds for 6.99 :):):) Also going to pick up a really neat Christmas gift :)

Jim has a link on his links page to a freebies site that we both look at. I can say with great authority that you do indeed receive the samples in the mail :) At least I have received all of mine :)

Ok, to anyone who read this far... Big slice of pie... (Mine would be pecan, but you have your choice of pecan, pumpkin, chocolate mocha coffee mousse, or new york cheesecake)

Happy Thanksgiving :-)

Angel

Fame

Jim and I were talking before we went to sleep, as we often do...

One thing that keeps coming to my mind is that fame is great, and can allow you to live a life of luxury and wealth... but I think fame should come with a black box warning label.

It seems to me that fame somehow buys you enablers, and buys you the right to either not listen to anyone who has your best interests at heart, or maybe people around you just stop telling you when you are messing up?

I was saying to Jimbo that maybe once you make so much money that all of the people around you are paid by you... and since they are your meal ticket, you just "look the other way" on things that, in any other situation, and with anyone else, you would take a hard line and do as much as possible to help that person get back on track..

I guess it is probably easy to tell that I am referring to Britney Spears. But there are so many out there... Anna Nichole Smith was another... and I am sure there are tons of them.... people who have so much money and "power" that no one feels ok with telling them there are lines that you should not cross, and tell them when they need help.

I guess fame should come with a warning label.. I guess for me, I better just start buying lottery tickets, and make my millions that way (lol) I hear you have to actually BUY the tickets in order to win :)

I hope that all who are famous can find just one person they can listen to, confide in, and trust to tell them when they are not on the right track.. heck, push their butt back to the right track!!!!!

Oh, and as a post script... I need to stop reading celebrity "news"... gossip can NOT be good for ya to be reading... call me curious I guess... seeing how the "other half" lives...

And, PPS.. a special thank you to Jimbo, and the people in my life that keep me normalized, tell me when I am being crazy, and loving me through it all!!! PRICELESS

Fall ...Bliss

I just wanted to make sure I updated with this great news. The air conditioner is off! It is about 65 degrees outside.. nice breeze blowing through the apartment!!

I am very happy about this weather :) I could take this all year long. I think it is going to get warmer this week again, but its OK, because I got this day!!

We got a new desktop computer. Very good processor, got it at Wal*Mart. I know that people see problems with them, but for a struggling college family, a nice desktop for $398.00 when the other places (locally owned) in town were charging 550...... I have to go with the best value for the money...

I also cut my hair.. VERY VERY short... We are going to call it... Shockingly Short. I like it. It was time for a change. It is also blonde now. I will have to post a picture sometime..

What I have been doing?!

I haven't been doing a lot. Summertime.. for many it is the best part of the year..
For me, not so much. I do love that Jim is not in class, so we can do more together, but I am *NOT* a fan of the heat. Not in any way. About the only thing I can think of about summer I like.. well, 2 things... One is that we can swim in Lewis and Clark lake, in Yankton, SD.... number 2 is that I don't like to drive in the dark, so the days are longer and I can drive later :) ---- I know that many people probably think I am crazy loving the fall and winter, but lately, the snow has not been as often or as bad as I remember from when I was young, so I don't complain.. Top 10 things about fall/winter

1. Open windows in fall :)
2. Baking cookies and casseroles
3. Nice warm sweaters :)
4. Hot apple cider
5. Walks without sweating like swine :)
6. Brisk cool mornings and plenty of sunshine all day long
7. Curling up with Jim under a throw blanket to watch a movie :)
8. Pumpkins and pumpkin pie
9. Chili, soups, long cooking dishes and stuff all come back :)
10. I guess the top one for me would boil down to this... it is much easier to use a blanket, or put on a sweater to warm up, but much harder to cool down in summer!!

I can't wait until fall comes :):):) am I the only one? I will have to say goodbye to the lake and swimming and grilling, but hello to all of the things I mentioned in my top 10 :) bring it on :)

Thanks for reading :)

Angel Chasse (again)